The outside of my DMV registration renewal envelope

informs me:

For the price of a postage stamp, you:

*Help fight air pollution, traffic congestion and tax increases.
*Save valuable time, money for gas and wear on your vehicle.
By using the mail, you have chosen the easiest way to submit a DMV application and have assisted us with providing better service.

Thank you,
Department of Motor Vehicles

For those of you who have not had the pleasure (and by that I mean "suicide induction experience") of becoming acquainted with the LA DMV, let me assure you, I save a lot more than the price of a stamp and gas money by avoiding it. Assumming your local DMV is anything like any of the other 110% of DMVs I've encountered in the lower 48 and Alaska (I could just tell about some of them from driving by), you know what I mean. The DMV is a place where efficiency is avoided at all costs - as are pleasantries. I'm pretty sure they don't even allow cheeky Garfield mugs or tired xeroxes about how Mondays suck. Once the DMV Czar finds out someone's been putting nice messages on the outside of the return envelopes, you can bet some anomolous, chipper bureaucrat's going to have some remedial training modules to complete.